Crib---check

Changing table--check

Stroller--check (got a good deal on a bugaboo on eBay!)

Natural Childbirth book--check

Just ordered Ina May's Guide to Childbirth from Amazon, mostly because I'm tired of having the beejezus scared out of me by everyone who has ever given birth. This book, by one of the country's leading midwives, is full of positive and inspirational stories of births that went as planned. And the second half goes into details about labor, and weighs in on things like episiotomies and such. 

I'm looking forward to reading something that is less clinical then What to Expect, less hysterical and mean then pregnancy chat boards (for the love!) and less pessimistic and scary then everyone who talks to me. 

I'm really interested in doing this as naturally as possible. I don't want an epidural, I'd rather do breathing and meditation. I don't want an episiotomy, I want massage to keep a tear from happening. I don't want to be cured of my pregnancy, I want to experience giving birth. 

But my stint in the ER last week really upped my fear of extended pain, and the never-ending stream of sensational horror stories isn't helping. I'm almost to the point of feeling like I need to be knocked unconscious, which I think I was told they used to do women in the 50s.

So I'm hoping Ina May will put things in a better perspective. If not, I have another 6 months to decide how I want to do things.