A few things going on.

1. The realization that, while I adore my child, she ruined my body. Ryan disagrees, but what does he know. I didn't have a single stretch mark through most of my pregnancy. And then she dropped. And now they are EVERYWHERE--hips, belly, breasts, even my inner thighs (all the way down to my knees). From a philosophical stand point, I try to convince myself they are hard-earned badges. But I know how easy it was to gain weight. Not one of those showed up as a result of pushing out a child. So I don't buy my b.s. So bathing suit wearing, even after weight loss, will involve a lot of hoping nobody can see the angry red marks down my legs. Because I didn't have enough body image issues.

2. The nipple shield is still in full swing after all. It's like she realized she could do fine without it, but insists on it just the same. The long process of weaning (information here) is about to begin. Fortunately, I've become a lot more patient about it, and using it honestly doesn't bother me so much. I'd still like to see her not using it.

3. I'm Kate and I'm a milk-aholic. For serious. Ryan and I have always bought in gallons because I will drink it. In cereal, with sweets, just because I'm thirsty. Love, love, love. My daughter, however, can't deal with it. Cow's milk in a momma's diet is a big reason for tummy and digestive issues in breast feeding babies. The antibodies and proteins are hard on their immature digestive systems. So, I have had to go off of my dear cow's milk. And we've seen significant improvement in gassiness, fussiness, and giant, everything she just ate, spit ups.

What's surprised me is how much my diet has changed just by eliminating milk. I don't eat sweets if I don't have milk to drink with it. My breakfasts have changed from cereal to fruit and protein based. Can't do cream based pastas and soups for dinner. It seems it's good for both of us. I am using oat and almond milks for cooking and substituting (oat is the most tolerable for drinking).

4. I've discovered a little something else about myself. I am a very patient mom (something I never expected), until I get tired. Then Ryan has to spend equal time consoling both of us, for both of our world's are ending. I've always known I don't handle stress well when tired, but I'm surprised at how badly I handle her when I'm tired. Fortunately, Ryan is home then and he can take over for me. And it's only happened a few times.

5. I'm still losing weight. The baby weight is gone, but I'm trying to keep the momentum going. The lack of milk is helping, because of afore mentioned disinterest in sweets. I'm also going to the gym about every other night. This is a good time to get some good habits going!