2. My daughter could easily get her own 10, but she is the funniest, sweetest, sunniest, most dramatic little singing and dancing queen. She loves to be included, give kisses, say "baby," "chickee" (her favorite stuffee), and "KITTTTEEEEEEEEEEEE." She also loves to dance, make up songs, sing "ABCs" and "Twinkle Twinkle," try to put on her own socks, play Peek-A-Boo in the car, sit on the couch and read stories, and share her snack with the dog. When she's upset (aka-tired) she hurls herself into the couch/loveseat/floor/leans on wall and sobs into her little arms like her tired, dramatic heart is breaking. And I just laugh because she's delightful and hilarious.
3. My husband could get his own 10, too, but lately I appreciate his ability to adapt as I change, his dedication to taking care of himself, and his capability. When I visited a friend in Neb last weekend, she asked if Ryan's mom or anyone had come to help him with Rory while I was gone. I was a little stunned because it never occurred to me that some men would need help, and I totally cracked up. Not mine. He doesn't babysit, he parents. He is an incredible daddy, but I don't feel like I've lost any part of him to my daughter. Instead I get to see this amazing side of him I thought she would bring out.
4. My backyard is making my spring time so much better. I weeded today, and I love our lush, green lawn, our roses, our deck furniture. The relaxing little nook in the world that is ours. It's lovely.
5. My job. Even if you want to take out everything it does for my resume, it is amazing for my self esteem in ways I can't begin to explain. I feel less needy and fragile than I have in a long time. I think part of it is working with a crop of fabulous, self-assured, capable women who are my age (I'm actually on the older end). There is something about working with people who are sure of themselves, you know they aren't bullshitting you with their compliments. Sure we have our gossipy/snipiness, but nobody is going to throw anybody under the bus.
6. My social life. I am having so much fun, I've had to put a limit on it. I know how much I enjoy going out and socializing, so my rule is: Once during the week, once on the weekend, people can come over once a week. Cause that's almost half the week right there. There are exceptions, like if Rory is going out with me (as in movie night tonight). The point is to keep my family time priority, because I do get a little nuts when I haven't had quality time with Ryan. Since I work part time, time with Rory hasn't been an issue.
7. My alone time. I used to feel like I had way too much of it, and so I hated it. But now I'm so busy with the family, work, friends, new things. When I get to do something alone, I relish it. Like right now.
8. My balance. Everything feels good, right, and as it should be. I recognize this is a moment to moment thing, and it's not always perfectly even (of course). But everything closer to centered then it has in a long time.
9. My liberation? Maybe it's therapy, but I feel less weighed down and controlled by my past. I'm not trying to make decisions to make up for my history anymore, instead I'm making them to build the future we want (holy cheesiness!).
10. Me. For serious. I am learning a lot about myself that had been forgotten in that last years of depression, boredom, and lack of fulfillment. I am kind of awesome. I really enjoying being me in my life and my skin. It's really, really good.
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| Playing with water on the kitchen floor (wearing Mommy's jewelry) |
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| Whatchoo talkin' bout? |
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| Her daddy's legs |
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