Grandma
My grandmother is going home from the hospital today! They found colon cancer last week and did surgery to remove part of her colon. At 83 with a history of strokes and heart problems, the surgery was risky. But, she made it. She was tired and very down when I spoke to her on the phone, but now that she's going home, hopefully she'll cheer up. She gets depressed when she's in the hospital for a while
Our Rental
Our tenant has been a nightmare. I'm trying not to take it as a huge personal failure that I did such a poor job picking someone. She has been late with her rent every single month. We changed the rent due date to accommodate her. It actually made things worse. She stopped telling us when she would pay us, started giving us loads of excuses. "I lost my ATM card, so I couldn't get cash." You know, you can actually walk into a bank and get money? Etc.
So, I sent her a letter in July, saying we'd use August to get caught up (she owed us for July and two late fees at the time), but that if she was late in September or October, we would not renew her lease in November (her lease ends Nov. 30). She freaked out. Told us she couldn't be expected to pay her rent on time every month (like the rest of the world does. Like we do with two mortgages). She said she'd just have to move out, Ryan said that was her choice, but her lease is up in November. She gave us part of the July rent, two weeks late, and promised to have the rest the next week. Didn't happen.
August came, and the due date whooshed by and no rent. No answering calls. She finally responds to Ryan's email, "Well, since you guys are kicking me out anyways, I figured I'd just take my time getting the money to you." That's not what we said. At any point.
Today we sent her a notice saying she can choose to get paid up in full, including September rent, by September 15th or she can move out by September 15. This would avoid eviction, but she would also forfeit her security deposit. Honestly, moving out is the cheaper option, as she now owes us quite a bit. I'm really hoping we don't have to evict.
Rory
The small fry is going through something, and I'm not entirely sure what. Of course, being me, I want to blame myself as I've been exhausted and sleeping in every day (thank you, Ryan). It's the end of summer, she's getting really bored. We go to the library and the zoo, but she much prefers playing with her scooter friends. But they have started school, and have limited play time now.
She's whiney. She's argumentative. If you explain something to her she doesn't want to hear she rolls her eyes and says "Ugh, stop!" It's like having a tiny belligerent teenager. A few things are changing for her.
- If she says "stop" to either of us she goes straight to her room.
- If she hits she goes straight to her room (that's not really a change, but an instant 'sorry' isn't going to cut it anymore).
- If she argues for "Ten minutes" she goes to her room. This was becoming a huge problem. Rory, it's almost bed time. Ten minutes. Actually, no, twenty. NO TEN MINUTES.
- If she screams at Mommy, Mommy leaves and play time is over.
I feel like she is very angry about something, and I don't know what. It's easy to say it's the baby, but that's such an abstract thing to her. Today she was feeding the baby in her tummy. I think it's just end of summer boredom and isolation more than anything. School will help out considerably.
My family
My dad and his family haven't really spoken to me in going on a year. Supposedly they are interested in working it out (I don't even know what 'it' is), but nobody, but me, has actually made an effort. I told them about the baby, they didn't even respond. Saturday was my sister's birthday and I had small meltdown the night before. I always call her, but I feel I've been told that I'm not supposed to call (I spent four months calling and they didn't answer or return a single one). But, she may not understand why she doesn't hear from me. So what do I do? I sent her a card, but I knew it would be late. I cried all Friday night, just freaking out about it. What if I called and Dad or Deb answered? I'd just start crying, I'd be so overwhelmed. I emailed my sis's email address, I don't know how often she checks it, and I wrote on her FB page. I hope she knew I was thinking of her.
My birthday
I turn 31 on Thursday, and right now my only plan is a job interview. I'm going to be very aware of the people I don't hear from (above), because usually my birthday is the only time I know I will hear from them. I think Ryan is making me birthday doughnuts, and I'm going to get some family friendly movies for a movie night. Just going to distract myself and try really hard to focus on the wonderful people in my life, and not the ones who aren't there. This weekend I'll get to celebrate with friends, I just have to make it through Thursday.
The Job
It's not glamorous, but I think I could like it. People who like to bake and it's actually policy that you get your birthday off (as well as three weeks vacation, paid holidays, matched 401k, great health benefits, etc). I figured I'd interview and one of two things would happen: the pregnancy would be a deal breaker, or they wouldn't offer enough. I looked into Rory's school and care for this next one, and came up with a number and then added extra money to it. And then a little more. And my headhunter came back with.... exactly that number.
They loved me. Like a lot. There are two positions open and I am one of two people going back for second interviews. My headhunter is going to let the hiring manager know I'm pregnant before I go in, and that I require a certain amount of maternity leave, regardless of my family medical leave act eligibility, and then we'll see if they still want me for that second interview.
I'm still a little conflicted about it. Ryan is being wonderful and telling me it's up to me, if nothing else at least I know I'm still hirable and I can take that from this experience. I just can't decide.
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