Cyrus VMA's performance.

Working on a gender studies paper I may as well weigh on the Cyrus activities, as it's swirling in my head.

So, as though my opinion were very, very relevant:

Distasteful:
Yes, it was. I adore Gaga, and her performance, because she brings a level of art to her work, even if she is scantily clad. This was not that. The tongue constantly out the mouth while bent over made her look vaguely canine. The teddy bears? Just... what? I thought it was a nod to Spears' teletubby photo shoot, but I am probably overthinking it.

Speaking of Britney:As Cyrus was wearing a nude bikini, I've read lots of comparisons to Britney's nude sparkly striptease. I remember when that happened, I was trying to wait tables at a restaurant with TVs and couldn't get anyone's attention. They were all fixated. So far, my favorite outcry is "Britney was classy!" Um... what? Stripping down to a bedazzled nude outfit with flashing thong is the antithesis of classy. So what's real the difference?

Sexually Suggestive v. Aggressive:There is the 'problem'. Spears mastered sexually suggestive at a disturbingly young age. Her whole schtick (contributing to the issue of growing up in the limelight) has always been "Oops! I was accidentally sexy and have no idea what I'm doing! I don't feel sexual, I just somehow am." There's a disconnect. She evoked sexy while denying being sexual. She never smiled during her performances, just hit her mark with crazy rhythm.

Cyrus was sexually aggressive. Gyrating, humping, and the biggest offense: clearing enjoying herself. Pretending to rim her dancer (another issue about this performance: holy racism), simulating masturbation, "twerking" (please, let that word die) in front of a married man almost twice her age. All of it with a big smile.

But we've seen that before:Male performers do it ALL THE TIME - grinding on back up dancers, grabbing their junk. Female performers do it more and more frequently. Madonna was sexually aggressive 25 years ago, simulating masturbation on the VMA stage, etc. Yes, it was shocking. Yes, there was slut shaming. But her fans didn't turn on her, they bought more rubber bangles and rosaries. Cyrus' own twitter followers are calling her a whore.

But we watched this girl grow up:
Exactly. Madonna never peddled lip gloss to preteens. She was well in her twenties when she sang "Like A Virgin." There was never a discussion about who her audience was. Cyrus started out squeaky Disney clean, a corporate promise to keep daughters safe and innocent until... who knows when. When you sell a person like a commodity, when do they get to just be a person?

Every girl grew up:And that's the culture thing about this that bothers me. I don't particularly care about of displays of sexuality on a show that has been intent on shocking sexually for 30 years. Seriously? Anyone who grew up with a TV set should know by now - DON'T LET CHILDREN WATCH THE VMAS. Or MTV. The thing that bothers me is: every girl on these stages grew up and somebody watched. We should be up in arms and upset about all the girls in videos are put on display for their body parts. All the girls who think bending over and grinding their ass on someone is the best way to get some attention. That. That is what we need to fix.

How do you fight culture:Don't let your kids watch the VMAs. Keep it out of your house. Those Disney Princesses, animated and otherwise, are toxic. And it's really easy to say that here with my three year old who isn't interested. I have no experience battling it in any significant way.

My only plan is to do what my mom did (and worked pretty well, I had my club moments of misbehavior, but I was an adult exploring my own sexuality. Thankfully not on a televised stage. Turns out, trying to flirt and dance in a club just made me uncomfortable). She talked to me. Why I wasn't allowed to listen to Madonna or Michael Jackson. Why I wasn't allowed to watch MTV or music videos. And now, Rory wants to know why she isn't allowed to listen to "Blurred Lines." She hasn't actually heard it, she's heard a few beats and then I change it, and she wants to know why. At three, the answer she gets is: Because it's for grown ups and it isn't about very nice things. I'll get more detailed as she gets older.

Right now she accepts that answer. At some point, she'll argue and push for me to change my mind. But. I. Won't.

And the racism. Far more qualified people than I have written about the racism in the performance.