I am a worrier, but I do it a little differently. I don't worry about known things. I worry about things that NEVER happen. Because those are the things we are ill-prepared for. It's why chaos theory was the easiest theory for me to understand and teach in college. My brain is hardwired to live it.
For instance, I had a hormone induced (I swear) melt down last week because I was CONVINCED that my unborn child had punched his way through my cervix (he punches me in the cervix regularly. It's delightful. If you see me sitting calmly and then jump out of my skin, that's probably what happened), and his tiny hand had gotten trapped on the other side. The result of this, in my mind, is that his hand is now stuck, and cannot continue to develop until after birth. And he will have a tiny hand for his whole life.
And, yes, I sobbed into my husband's chest that "he'll be the Nemo of people." And, yes, he miraculously did not laugh, but asked if I'd googled "baby hand trapped in cervix failed to grow" to see if this ever actually happened. For the record, there are no known cases.
So, when I went into my doctor today, I told her I'd had some high anxiety for the last couple weeks. I'd just been worried about a few things. She asked me what I'd been worried about, and I proceeded to explain my "cervix punching/tiny hand" theory to an actual medical professional, because I am shameless. And she laughed and laughed and laughed. And said, "Usually moms come in worried about nuchal cords. I have actually never, ever had someone worried about tiny-handed Nemo syndrome" (at least it has a name now). And she confirmed that there were no known cases. And also confirmed, again, because I insist on it, there is still ONLY ONE BABY.
The little prize-fighters cervical punches also yield another delightful side effect: lots of fluids. Like lots. Like enough to cause my second worry for the week: that I'm leaking amniotic fluid. But no! I'm measuring 27 weeks at 26 weeks, a clear sign that there is plenty of fluid (I'd be measuring small if I'd been leaking).
And the reason for the one baby confirmation? Again? Because he is very low into my pelvis, and I feel him simultaneously behind my pubic bone and next to my ribs. So if there is just one, he is already a long fellow.
In comparing this pregnancy with the last one, I am not impressed with myself. With Rory the SPD started WAAAAYYYY later and I exercised much more regularly. I've pretty much stopped exercising because it couches me with pain. But my chiropractor insists that exercising in shorter time periods will help with the SPD, so I'm going to try to get on my elliptical a few times a week. And she's ordering a brace for me to keep my hips together and my belly supported. I don't think I could do this a third time if SPD gets earlier and worse with each baby. No flipping way.
Other than that? Rory's new haircut is adorable and perfect for her. She likes to lean on the belly and then say, "The baby said 'Get off me, big sister!'" and crack up and do it again. I hate my job and have to mutter "health insurance" every hour to get through the day. Ryan is an amazing house buddy, and does wonders taking care of all of us (since I can, obviously, not walk or fetch things for myself, because I am pregnant and achy and whine a lot).
And also, I may be Dooneese for Halloween next year. Because that's what this whole Nemo thing makes me think of.
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